If I could get my hands on that man, I’d take a baseball bat to him and beat him black and blue! Do you know what she said about me? Did you see that, his car almost hit mine? Is he drunk or something? If I didn’t have the kids in the car I’d show him “close”!
Wow! Sounds like someone’s blood pressure is about to blow it’s top! We have all been there to some degree. It starts as a little irritation but instead of confessing it quick and forgiving the person, we let it simmer on the back burner of our mind. We kind of like it back there. Then any other little annoyance gets added to the pot until by the time everyone is ready for dinner you’re ready to explode.
The damage that your explosion causes is not some little spot that is quickly wiped up. No, this is a stew pot of tomato sauce that has been left on high, with no lid, for hours. There is sauce everywhere, floor, ceiling, walls, stove, countertops; everything is covered in the fallout.
Brothers and Sisters, you just overdrew your “Trust Account” with your family. You work hard building trust with every person you meet but you work hardest building that trust with your family.
Home is supposed to be a place where there is safety, security, trust and acceptance. Where you know that being called only by your first name means you’re not in trouble, yet. But if you ever hear your full name, oh Kid, you’re in for it now! Be prepared to duck and cover your behind because you’re about to have the “Board of Education” applied to your “Seat of Understanding”!
The worst part of this kind of anger is, after the explosion and the dust settles, we are standing there shaking our head because we have no idea how the anger got so out of hand to begin with. We are appalled by what we just did and filled with shame at the look of surprise and hurt in our family’s faces. Yes, I know that look. I used to be that person, who first received the anger as a child then grew up and gave it to my own child.
I never understood my step-mothers insistence that everything had to be done just so. If it wasn’t, she would not only take her anger out on me but she taught me how to hold on to my own anger, bitterness and resentment.
Thankfully, one day in my early twenties, the Lord decided He had enough of my attitude and decided to do a little anger management of His own. He brought me face to face with myself. “Oh gross, Lord is that what anger really looks like to You? That stinking pile of soul-destroying, cancer causing, putrefying mess? Ew, I agree, let’s get rid of it all. Except this little piece here called “step-mom”. I like being angry at her.”
It took six months of battling the devil before the victory was won. Anger was defeated, sin was forgiven and the trust account was able to start gaining interest of a better value. A few years later I was able to sit at her bedside as she slipped into Heaven with a full and overflowing Trust Account filled with the Father’s love.
Please believe me when I tell you that anger is one of those weeds in your life that if you let it grow will not only ruin your life but will be passed down to your family and their families for generations. “A man (or woman) of wrath stirs up strife, and one given to anger causes much transgression.” Proverbs 29:22 (ESV) (paraphrase mine)
There are many verses in God’s Word that states it is good to be slow to anger and quick to forgive. “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.” Proverbs 19:11 (ESV) I know it is hard sometimes but it is to your benefit and your family’s to do so.
I like The Message because it puts the Word of God in unvarnished language. Proverbs 14:29 says “Slowness to anger makes for deep understanding; a quick-tempered person stockpiles stupidity.” Isn’t it the truth?
So, how is your “Trust Account” with each member of your family holding up today? Are those individual accounts full to the brim, pressed down and overflowing or do they need some deposits made? When you take the time with each member every day and make sure their accounts are full, you will find your own account has filled up too. Nice how that works out, huh?